Motel Introspections
by Hina Kariachi Hakubi
Summary: He knew he shouldn't be doing this, but... Levinstar, SLASH


Hey guys, managed to write something again. And I finished it this time! You have no idea how much stuff doesn't go up here because I haven't figured out how it ends yet. At least four MaxDevin fics are caught in this limbo as we speak.

Anyway, **warnings are in order**, we have mentions of past smut and Kevin/Darkstar, with mentions of prior Gwen/Kevin, and brief mentions of prior Argit/Kevin. There's probably a lot of OOC-ness as well as plenty of poor writing. If you are in any way hurt or offended by anything at any point, feel free to hit the back button. I won't be offended, not everybody can handle what my brain deals out.

* * *

He knew he should leave, probably soon, but damnit he just didn't want to. The motel linens were itchy, and he'd never admit to feeling even the least bit safe, but he was comfortable the way he was. Kevin lifted a hand to lightly stroke the taut, dry cheek of the man that lay across him, and was rewarded with a pleasant murmur into his shoulder.

They had been doing this for months now, ever since he and Gwen's breakup and the subsequent drunken hookup. He couldn't remember what exactly had caused him to drag his companion from the filthy bar they'd found each other in, reeking of alcohol, to the backseat of his precious car. Chances were good it had simply been an act of rebellion, Kevin had always been good at those and it wasn't like the breakup had been pretty. But why didn't matter, it had happened, and then it happened again, and again. By the fifth time, there wasn't even an attempt to give the illusion of chance, he'd been visited at the garage by a pair of thin, cracked lips and long fingers in his hair and briefs.

Things had been understandably awkward at first; after all, it wasn't that long ago the two had been fighting to near death at every encounter, but time, familiarity, and sex that sometimes made him wonder if he was in a Bond film had softened the edges somewhat. A wordless truce sat between them, there was no trouble, no pursuit, and no possibly compromising information. There wasn't any fighting, on rare occasions there wasn't even any sex anymore; it was comfortable. Not that any of this would matter if the Tennyson's found out…

He really needed to leave soon.

Kevin began to gently toy with a bit of white hair. He and the Tennysons' relationship had been tense since the breakup and he just _knew_ that this would be more than enough to shatter what was left of them. That should have been enough reason for him to stop, to walk away and never look back, but… But he hadn't felt this comfortable in his own skin in a long time.

Earlier relationships (Gods, was he really lumping this in with his relationships? What was wrong with him?) had had some serious problems. The Lords knew he and Argit had had just about the least healthy relationship in history;, the cousins had just about lost it and Max suggested he press charges when he'd told them about it, all referring to it as 'severely abusive'. It wasn't until Andreas that he'd taken them seriously.

Gwen hadn't been nearly that bad. She had loved him, and hadn't wanted to see any harm come to him. Unless, of course, she felt he'd done or said something stupid, but she hadn't poisoned him at any point, so hey, whatever. Really, their problems hadn't been her fault, they were just how he was, insecure and antisocial. Most of it had been his issues with authority, she liked to be in control of what was going on and was a severe Type A, he, on the other hand, had a natural drive to fight authority and orders at all costs. Not a good combination. The insecurity was more tied to their intelligence. Once again, it wasn't any harm she intended, and was most probably not even aware of, but her tendency to become antsy or belligerent when someone was smarter than her had done nothing to make him comfortable. At one point he'd bean dipped a question about an IQ test to avoid telling her how much higher his score had been. She had always tried her hardest to get him to show how smart he was, but he just couldn't overcome that fear that being intelligent would haunt him.

That wasn't a problem here, his lover had been open about his belief in Kevin's lack of brain power and the Osmosian had been more than happy to prove him wrong. After all, it wasn't like either one could think any less of the other in any case, and this acknowledgement had led to several interesting discussions, including ones on the gay rights movement, ballet, and a very fun one on proper muffin making techniques in which Kevin had blown his mind with an onslaught of intricate molecular gastronomy.

It had taken a few minutes to unbreak the other man, and he was pretty sure the reaction was genuine.

Neither one seemed willing to take charge for fear of messing things up, absolving the issue of Kevin's authority problems, nor was there a way for him to match Argit. So in some ways everything was great.

Not to say that their, thing, was in any way healthy. Kevin was wandering off, without letting anyone know where he was going, to do filthy things with a man he couldn't trust. A man that had spent years fighting him, who had a history of using people, who had gotten them onto a first name basis, which he was just _sure_ was a method of getting him to drop his guard! This was going to end with him broken and his world in shambles, he just knew it. No matter what was said, how they acted, that was all it was, an act.

Cautiously, he moved the sleeping body off to the side, slowly starting to dress. He didn't want to think of it that way, really he didn't, but he knew that thinking otherwise would only make things harder once everything fell apart. Finishing with his boots, he bent over to grab one of his shirts just as he felt a tug on one belt loop.

"See you again?" Pulling the long sleeve over his head, Kevin put on his best smirk and looked down at tired blue eyes.

"If things don't go wrong, we'll see." He reached to snatch his tee off a bedpost, shivering when the blond shifted to reach his arm. Fingertips trailed up to and buried in his shirt, pulling him down into a kiss. It was soft and sweet and he had to remind himself that there weren't any feelings on the other end. That fucking- There was a tongue in his mouth for a split second before they broke apart, his lover smirking.

"We'll have to make sure things don't go wrong then." Kevin stood there a moment, running the situation over in his head for the million-and-second time, then leaned in for another kiss.

"Night Michael."

"Night Kevin." And he was out the door, shirt sliding over his head, tongue darting out to catch the hint of the vampire on his lips. He knew everything was going to go to shit, but that was the story of his life. At least this time he'd have some fun with it first.

* * *

It took three tries to be satisfied with the ending, and I'll probably never really like it. Still, it's not half bad. I hope.

Anyone who enjoyed this can feel free to thank Colleen-TJ, for whom I'm posting this; I probably wouldn't have bothered if she hadn't wanted more Levinstar on this site; and read her work, as it's much better than mine, if angsty as a summabitch.

Also feel free to write/draw/make vids for Levinstar, we're suffering over here.!

Thank you, everyone who read this far, I am forever in your debt. Please review, tell me what you liked, what you hated, stuff like that. Just remember, flamers will be fed to Michael.


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